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Starting to Get Nervous...

With just over two weeks to go until my hip surgery I am getting nervous. This feeling has really surprised me, this is the 3rd surgery I will have had. Ok so for the first I was only three so I did not exactly know what was going on, but last year when I had knee surgery I did.

Before the knee surgery there was not a definite plan, the doctor would go in and see what was happening, and hopefully fix it. Well that kind of happened but not totally. Without a plan I should have been nervous before that surgery but wasn't. So I don't know why I am sitting here over a year later, weeks before hip surgery, one where I know exactly what is going to happen nervous?

Maybe it is because nothing was going right for so long? Maybe it is because my hip will be dislocated? Maybe it is the possibility of missing three weeks of school? (Hopefully I will only miss one week)

What scares me the most is if it doesn't help, what will be next? Or what if the biopsy comes back positive for RA? Or Lyme? Or both? Or neither?

I am channeling my fears into preparing for surgery. Thinking up ways to decorate my crutches, and online shopping for shoes to wear after surgery.

Toms should be easy to slip on right? Not to mention they come in glitter!

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