Be Okay 2014

If you have been arounds this blog for a while you know at the end of the year I choose a song to go with the year. This year's song is Be Okay by Oh Honey. 

I choose this song because I feel like it reflects the attitude I have had the year. Even through hell this last year it has also been one of if not the best year of my life. Almost all the good things that have happened have somehow been results of my health.

In the beginning of the year I was newly diagnosed with Celiac disease so I went to the campus dietician. Little did I know at the time what a major role she would play in my life. A couple weeks later I started babysitting her kids 4 times a week and her family became my second family. Not only that I know if I ever need something I can ask her, she has taken me to the ER and I have stayed at there house when I wasn't feeling good. I can not thank her and her family enough for how they take care of me.

The same time I started working for them I was asked to take over a 2nd grade Hebrew school class at the Hebrew school were I had been substitute teaching. This is a big deal for me. I love working there and it looks amazing on my resume. In addition the faculty I am apart of there has been so supportive of all my health struggles.

Over the summer I worked at the same preschool I have worked at in the past. The director has served as my mentor. She has also been chronically ill her whole life so she truly gets it. During my hardest times she provided me with incredible insights that have shaped my attitudes towards my health and how those around me deal with my health. We both know this coming summer I will need to stay in Philly to be near my doctors but leaving the preschool was probably the hardest part of my decision.

During my summer hospital stay I met some of the most incredible people. Towards the end of it I met Anna. She has been through so much at such a young age she proves to me it is possible to smile through everything.

Finally this semester has been a whirlwind with lots of hospitalizations and ER trips. By some miracle I made it through with the grades I needed to be able to get in to the program I want to do. I served on a committee for HootaThon, a dance marathon that raises money for CHOP. I also had the chance to speak at it and a high school dance marathon which was an amazing opportunity. 

I am so thankful I have been surround by so much love and support in the last year. Those around me have taught me how to be strong. I would not trade in the bad because with out the bad I would not of had the good.

Why I Should Not be Pitied

During my last Rheumatologist appointment at the very end my doctor, who spends everyday seeing children with rheumatic conditions, gave me the most heartbreaking look of pity ever saying that I need many doctors just not her right now. This was not how I pictured the appointment where my joints were finally doing well to go. In my head I figured if I ever got to a point where I could go a full year without seeing a rheumatologist it would be a happy occasion. This had been the appointment I had been waiting for and my joints behaved as I wanted them to. Yet the look the doctor gave me at the end is what is ingrained in my memory.

Yes, I am sick. No, I do not enjoy getting about 95% of my nutrition through a tube. Yes, I wish I could reliably stay vertical whenever I please. Yes, I do miss gluten sometimes. Heres the thing though, even though I wish my health was different, if changing it meant I risk changing other aspects of my life I would keep everything the same.

My life is pretty darn good. I am a college student that loves my major. I am working towards my dreams, getting closer everyday. Unlike many of my friends who spend hours looking for jobs to no avail, I practically fell into two jobs, both of which I love. One job I would have never gotten if it was not for being diagnosed with Celiac during my Freshman year. On top of work I am part of a couple amazing student organization that give me leadership roles and the opportunity to help others. Best of all I have the most awesome people I know as friends who always pick me up when I fall down (some of which I met because of my horrible health).
Impromptu Concert in NYC

Cause what's better than lying in a hammock and laughing till you cry?

Classy Roomie Dates!

One of the most amazing people I would have never met if I wasn't sick!

I may not have my health but I have so much more. My life is better than many people I know who are completely healthy. That is why you should not pity me, because my life is pretty amazing.